Trivia:

Mary Magdalene (and her seven devils)
8:1-3

1 And it came to pass afterward, that he went throughout every city and village, preaching and shewing the glad tidings of the kingdom of God: and the twelve were with him,

2 And certain women, which had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities, Mary called Magdalene, out of whom went seven devils,

3 And Joanna the wife of Chuza Herod's steward, and Susanna, and many others, which ministered unto him of their substance.

Jesus and his twelve disciples went through every city and village, preaching and showing glad tidinss.

Certain women, who had been healed of evil spirits and illnesses, folowed them.

Among these were Mary Magdalen, who had seven devils removed from her,

Joanna, Susanna, and many others, who served Jesus and his disciples.

The parable of the sower
8:4-8, Cf. Mt 13:1-9, Mk 4:1-9

4 And when much people were gathered together, and were come to him out of every city, he spake by a parable:

5 A sower went out to sow his seed: and as he sowed, some fell by the way side; and it was trodden down, and the fowls of the air devoured it.

6 And some fell upon a rock; and as soon as it was sprung up, it withered away, because it lacked moisture.

7 And some fell among thorns; and the thorns sprang up with it, and choked it.

8 And other fell on good ground, and sprang up, and bare fruit an hundredfold. And when he had said these things, he cried, He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.

Many people were gathered, when Jesus spoke this parable:

A sower sowed some seeds.

Some fell by the way side, and were trampled;

and some were eaten by birds;

some fell on a rock, and withered as soon as it sprouted, since they had no water;

some fell among thorns, and were choked by them.

And other seeds fell on good ground, and bore 100 times as much fruit.

When Jesus finished saying these things, he said,

If you have ears, hear.

The purpose of the parables (to confuse people)
8:9-10, Cf. Mt 13:10-17, Mk 4:10-12

9 And his disciples asked him, saying, What might this parable be?

Jesus's disciples asked him,

What does this parable mean?

10 And he said, Unto you it is given to know the mysteries of the kingdom of God: but to others in parables; that seeing they might not see, and hearing they might not understand.

Jesus said,

You can know the mysteries of the kingdom of God.

But I speak in parables to everyone else,

so that they will hear and see, but not understand. [1]

Jesus explains the parable of the sower
8:11-15, Cf. Mt 13:18-23, Mk 4:10-13

11 Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God.

Jesus said to his disciples,

The seed is God's word.

12 Those by the way side are they that hear; then cometh the devil, and taketh away the word out of their hearts, lest they should believe and be saved.

Those by the way side, hear, but the devil comes and takes the word away to keep them from being saved.

13 They on the rock are they, which, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, which for a while believe, and in time of temptation fall away.

The seed that falls on rock are those who hear the word with joy, but have no root, so they believe for a while and then fall away when temptation comes.

14 And that which fell among thorns are they, which, when they have heard, go forth, and are choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to perfection.

The seed that falls among thorns are those who hear, but are choked by the cares of the world.

15 But that on the good ground are they, which in an honest and good heart, having heard the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience.

The seed that falls on good ground are those with honest and good hearts that receive the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience.

Candles, secrets, haves, and have nots
8:16-18, Cf. Mk 4:21-25

16 No man, when he hath lighted a candle, covereth it with a vessel, or putteth it under a bed; but setteth it on a candlestick, that they which enter in may see the light.

Jesus said,

You don't put a candle under a bowl or bed.

You set it on a candlestick, so you can see.

17 For nothing is secret, that shall not be made manifest; neither any thing hid, that shall not be known and come abroad.

There will be no secrets.

Everything that is hid, will be exposed.

18 Take heed therefore how ye hear: for whosoever hath, to him shall be given; and whosoever hath not, from him shall be taken even that which he seemeth to have.

Thos who have, will be given more.

Those who have not,

will have what little they have taken away. [2]

Jesus: Who is my mother?
8:19-21, Cf. Mt 12:46-50, Mk 3:31-35

19 Then came to him his mother and his brethren, and could not come at him for the press.

Jesus's mother and brothers came to see him, but it was too crowded.

20 And it was told him by certain which said, Thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to see thee.

So someone said to him,

Your mother and brothers are here to see you.

21 And he answered and said unto them, My mother and my brethren are these which hear the word of God, and do it.

Jesus said,

My mother and brothers are those who hear God's word and do it. [3]

Jesus calms a storm
8:22-25, Cf. Mt 8:23-27, Mk 4:35-41

22 Now it came to pass on a certain day, that he went into a ship with his disciples: and he said unto them, Let us go over unto the other side of the lake. And they launched forth.

One day Jesus said to his disciples,

Let's get on the boat and cross the lake.

23 But as they sailed he fell asleep: and there came down a storm of wind on the lake; and they were filled with water, and were in jeopardy.

As soon as they got on the boat, Jesus fell asleep.

And then a storm came up.

24 And they came to him, and awoke him, saying, Master, master, we perish. Then he arose, and rebuked the wind and the raging of the water: and they ceased, and there was a calm.

They woke Jesus up and said to him,

We're all going to die.

So Jesus got up and rebuked the wind and it was calm.

25 And he said unto them, Where is your faith? And they being afraid wondered, saying one to another, What manner of man is this! for he commandeth even the winds and water, and they obey him.

He said to them,

Where's your faith?

And they all were amazed that the wind and water obeyed him.

Jesus casts out more devils (and drowns some pigs)
8:26-39, Cf. Mt 8:28-34, Mk 5:1-20

26 And they arrived at the country of the Gadarenes, which is over against Galilee.

And they arrived in the country of the Gadarenes.

27 And when he went forth to land, there met him out of the city a certain man, which had devils long time, and ware no clothes, neither abode in any house, but in the tombs.

As they walked, a man came out of the city,

who had devils for a long time.

He was naked, homeless, and lived in the tombs. [4]

28 When he saw Jesus, he cried out, and fell down before him, and with a loud voice said, What have I to do with thee, Jesus, thou Son of God most high? I beseech thee, torment me not.

29 (For he had commanded the unclean spirit to come out of the man. For oftentimes it had caught him: and he was kept bound with chains and in fetters; and he brake the bands, and was driven of the devil into the wilderness.)

When he saw Jesus, he cried out with a loud voice, and said,

Jesus! What do I have to do with you, you Son of God?

Please don't torture me.

30 And Jesus asked him, saying, What is thy name? And he said, Legion: because many devils were entered into him.

Jesus said to him,"What's your name?"

He (or they) said, "Legion, because there are so many of us."

31 And they besought him that he would not command them to go out into the deep.

The devils begged Jesus not to send them into the pit. [5]

32 And there was there an herd of many swine feeding on the mountain: and they besought him that he would suffer them to enter into them. And he suffered them.

There was a herd of pigs on the mountain.

The devils asked Jesus to let them enter the pigs.

And Jesus said, "OK".

33 Then went the devils out of the man, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the lake, and were choked.

34 When they that fed them saw what was done, they fled, and went and told it in the city and in the country.

So the devils went out of the man and into the pigs,

who ran off a cliff into the lake and were drowned.

35 Then they went out to see what was done; and came to Jesus, and found the man, out of whom the devils were departed, sitting at the feet of Jesus, clothed, and in his right mind: and they were afraid.

36 They also which saw it told them by what means he that was possessed of the devils was healed.

The man who had the devils sat at Jesus's feet.

He was clothed and in his right mind.

37 Then the whole multitude of the country of the Gadarenes round about besought him to depart from them; for they were taken with great fear: and he went up into the ship, and returned back again.

Everyone in the country of the Gadarenes asked Jesus to leave.

So Jesus and his disciples got back on the boat and left.

38 Now the man out of whom the devils were departed besought him that he might be with him: but Jesus sent him away, saying,

39 Return to thine own house, and shew how great things God hath done unto thee. And he went his way, and published throughout the whole city how great things Jesus had done unto him.

The man who had the devils wanted to go with Jesus,

but Jesus sent him away, saying,

Go back to your own house,

and show everyone what great things have been do to you.

So that's what the man did.

Jarius's daughter and a woman with an issue of blood
8:40-56, Cf. Mt 9:18-26, Mk 5:21-43

40 And it came to pass, that, when Jesus was returned, the people gladly received him: for they were all waiting for him.

When Jesus returned, the people were waiting for him.

41 And, behold, there came a man named Jairus, and he was a ruler of the synagogue: and he fell down at Jesus' feet, and besought him that he would come into his house:

A man named Jarius, who was a ruler of a the synogogue, fell down at Jesus's feet and asked him to come to his house.

42 For he had one only daughter, about twelve years of age, and she lay a dying. But as he went the people thronged him.

He had a daughter, about twelve years old, who was dying. [6]

43 And a woman having an issue of blood twelve years, which had spent all her living upon physicians, neither could be healed of any,

At the same time,

a woman who had an issue of blood for twelve years,

whom non of the physicians could heal, [7]

44 Came behind him, and touched the border of his garment: and immediately her issue of blood stanched.

touched the edge of Jesus's garment,

and immediately her bleeding stopped. [8]

45 And Jesus said, Who touched me? When all denied, Peter and they that were with him said, Master, the multitude throng thee and press thee, and sayest thou, Who touched me?

Jesus said, "Who touched me?" [9]

Peter said, "Look at this crowd.
How could anyone know who touched you?"

46 And Jesus said, Somebody hath touched me: for I perceive that virtue is gone out of me.

Jesus said, "Well somebody touched me.
I could feel the virtue go out of me."

47 And when the woman saw that she was not hid, she came trembling, and falling down before him, she declared unto him before all the people for what cause she had touched him, and how she was healed immediately.

The woman saw that he knew, she fell down before him and said that she touched him and was healed immediately.

48 And he said unto her, Daughter, be of good comfort: thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace.

Jesus said, "Your faith has healed you. Go in peace." [10]

49 While he yet spake, there cometh one from the ruler of the synagogue's house, saying to him, Thy daughter is dead; trouble not the Master.

While Jesus was speaking, a messenger came to the ruler saying, "Your daughter is dead."

50 But when Jesus heard it, he answered him, saying, Fear not: believe only, and she shall be made whole.

51 And when he came into the house, he suffered no man to go in, save Peter, and James, and John, and the father and the mother of the maiden.

When Jesus heard it, he said,

Don't be afraid. Just believe and she'll be healed."

52 And all wept, and bewailed her: but he said, Weep not; she is not dead, but sleepeth.

Everyone was crying, but Jesus said,

Don't cry. She's not dead, she's just sleeping.

53 And they laughed him to scorn, knowing that she was dead.

Everyone laughted at him, since they knew she was dead.

54 And he put them all out, and took her by the hand, and called, saying, Maid, arise.

Jesus took the girl by the hand, and said,

Get up.

55 And her spirit came again, and she arose straightway: and he commanded to give her meat.

And she arose rightaway. [11]

Jesus told them to get her some food.

56 And her parents were astonished: but he charged them that they should tell no man what was done.

Everyone was astonished.

But he told them not to tell anyone.