Trivia:

Surah 12

JOSEPH (Yusuf)

The best story in the Quran
Absurdity 12:1-3

1 Alif. Lam. Ra. These are verse of the Scripture that maketh plain.

2 Lo! We have revealed it, a Lecture in Arabic, that ye may understand.

We [Allah] revealed this surah in Arabic,

so it's easy to understand.

3 We narrate unto thee (Muhammad) the best of narratives in that We have inspired in thee this Qur'an, though aforetime thou wast of the heedless.

It's the best story that we've inspired in the Quran.

Joseph and his brothers
Absurdity 12:4-18

4 When Joseph said unto his father: O my father! Lo! I saw in a dream eleven planets and the sun and the moon, I saw them prostrating themselves unto me.

5 He said: O my dear son! Tell not thy brethren of thy vision, lest they plot a plot against thee. Lo! Satan is for man an open foe.

6 Thus thy Lord will prefer thee and will teach thee the interpretation of events, and will perfect His grace upon thee and upon the family of Jacob as He perfected it upon thy forefathers, Abraham and Isaac. Lo! thy Lord is Knower, Wise.

7 Verily in Joseph and his brethren are signs (of Allah's Sovereignty) for the inquiring.

Joseph [1] said to his father,

I saw in a dream eleven planets, along with the sun and the moon, prostrating themselves before me. [2]

His father said,

Don't tell your brothers about your dream or they'll plot against you.

8 When they said: Verily Joseph and his brother are dearer to our father than we are, many though we be. Lo! our father is in plain aberration.

Joseph's brothers said,

Our father likes Joseph more than us.

9 (One said): Kill Joseph or cast him to some (other) land, so that your father's favour may be all for you, and (that) ye may afterward be righteous folk.

One of them said,

Let's kill him or send him to another land.

10 One among them said: Kill not Joseph but, if ye must be doing, fling him into the depth of the pit; some caravan will find him.

Another said,

No, let's throw him in a pit and some caravan will find him.

11 They said: O our father! Why wilt thou not trust us with Joseph, when lo! we are good friends to him?

So they said to their father,

Trust us with Joseph.

12 Send him with us to-morrow that he may enjoy himself and play. And lo! we shall take good care of him.

We'll take good care of him.

13 He said: Lo! in truth it saddens me that ye should take him with you, and I fear less the wolf devour him while ye are heedless of him.

Their father said,

I worry that a wolf will eat him.

14 They said: If the wolf should devour him when we are (so strong) a band, then surely we should have already perished.

They said,

Don't worry. We'll protect him from the wolf.

15 Then, when they led him off, and were of one mind that they should place him in the depth of the pit, We inspired in him: Thou wilt tell them of this deed of theirs when they know (thee) not.

Then they went away and put Joseph in a pit.

16 And they came weeping to their father in the evening.

17 Saying: O our father! We went racing one with another, and left Joseph by our things, and the wolf devoured him, and thou believest not our saying even when we speak the truth.

They returned to home, and said to their father, while weeping,

A wolf ate Joseph.

18 And they came with false blood on his shirt. He said: Nay, but your minds have beguiled you into something. (My course is) comely patience. And Allah it is Whose help is to be sought in that (predicament) which ye describe.

And they showed him Joseph'shirt with fake blood on it.

Joseph and the Egyptian's wife
Absurdity Women Sex 12:19-57

19 And there came a caravan, and they sent their waterdrawer. He let down his pail (into the pit). He said: Good luck! Here is a youth. And they hid him as a treasure, and Allah was Aware of what they did.

Meanwhile, a caravan came by and picked up Joseph.

20 And they sold him for a low price, a number of silver coins; and they attached no value to him.

21 And he of Egypt who purchased him said unto his wife: Receive him honourably. Perchance he may prove useful to us or we may adopt him as a son. Thus we established Joseph in the land that We might teach him the interpretation of events. And Allah was predominant in His career, but most of mankind know not.

22 And And when he reached his prime We gave him wisdom and knowledge. Thus We reward the good.

And sold him to an Egyptian for a low price.

23 And she, in whose house he was, asked of him an evil act. She bolted the doors and said: Come! He said: I seek refuge in Allah! Lo! he is my lord, who hath treated me honourably. Lo! wrong-doers never prosper.

The Egyptian's wife said to Joseph, "Come."

24 She verily desired him, and he would have desired her if it had not been that he saw the argument of his Lord. Thus it was, that We might ward off from him evil and lewdness. Lo! he was of Our chosen slaves.

She wanted him,

and he would have wanted her, if it wasn't for Allah.

25 And they raced with one another to the door, and she tore his shirt from behind, and they met her lord and master at the door. She said: What shall be his reward, who wisheth evil to thy folk, save prison or a painful doom?

26 (Joseph) said: She it was who asked of me an evil act. And a witness of her own folk testified: If his shirt is torn from before, then she speaketh truth and he is of the liars.

27 And if his shirt is torn from behind, then she hath lied and he is of the truthful.

While they raced to the door, she tore off his shirt.

When her husband saw them, she said,

What will you do with him?

Prison or a painful doom?

Joseph said,

Hey, she tore my shirt.

28 So when he saw his shirt torn from behind, he said: Lo! this is of the guile of you women. Lo! the guile of you is very great.

29 O Joseph! Turn away from this, and thou, (O woman), ask forgiveness for thy sin. Lo! thou art of the faulty.

30 And women in the city said: The ruler's wife is asking of her slave-boy an ill- deed. Indeed he has smitten her to the heart with love. We behold her in plain aberration.

When her husband saw that the shirt was torn from behind, he said,

That's just like a woman.

Women are filled with guile.

31 And when she heard of their sly talk, she sent to them and prepared for them a cushioned couch (to lie on at the feast) and gave to every one of them a knife and said (to Joseph): Come out unto them! And when they saw him they exalted him and cut their hands, exclaiming: Allah Blameless! This is no a human being. This is not other than some gracious angel.

The ruler's wife prepared a couch, gave every woman in the city a knife, and invited them to a feast. Then she said to Joseph,

Come out to them.

When the women saw Joseph, they were so excited that they cut their hands.

32 She said: This is he on whose account ye blamed me. I asked of him an evil act, but he proved continent, but if he do not my behest he verily shall be imprisoned, and verily shall be of those brought low.

The ruler's wife said to the women,

See, you can't blame me.

If he doesn't do what I want, he'll go to prison.

33 He said: O my Lord! Prison is more dear than that unto which they urge me, and if Thou fend not off their wiles from me I shall incline unto them and become of the foolish.

34 So his Lord heard his prayer and fended off their wiles from him. Lo! He is Hearer, Knower.

Joseph said,

I'd rather go to prison.

35 And it seemed good to them (the men-folk) after they had seen the signs (of his innocence) to imprison him for a time.

So the men-folk imprisoned Joseph.

36 And two young men went to prison with him. One of them said: I dreamed that I was pressing wine. The other said: I dreamed that I was carrying upon my head bread whereof the birds were eating. Announce unto us the interpretation, for we see thee of those good (at interpretation).

37 He said: The food which ye are given (daily) shall not come unto you but I shall tell you the interpretation ere it cometh unto you. This is of that which my Lord hath taught me. Lo! I have forsaken the religion of folk who believe not in Allah and are disbelievers in the Hereafter.

38 And I have followed the religion of my fathers, Abraham and Isaac and Jacob. It never was for us to attribute aught as partner to Allah. This is of the bounty of Allah unto us (the seed of Abraham) and unto mankind; but most men give not thanks.

39 O my fellow-prisoners! Are divers lords better, or Allah the One, Almighty?

40 Those whom ye worship beside Him are but names which ye have named, ye and your fathers. Allah hath revealed no sanction for them. The decision rests with Allah only, Who hath commanded you that ye worship none save Him. This is the right religion, but most men know not.

Two other men went to prison with Joseph.

They each had a dream.

One dreamed about making wine, the other about carrying bread on his head that the birds ate.

They asked Joseph to interpret them.

41 O my two fellow-prisoners! As for one of you, he will pour out wine for his lord to drink; and as for the other, he will be crucified so that the birds will eat from his head. Thus is the case judged concerning which ye did inquire.

42 And he said unto him of the twain who he knew would be released: Mention me in the presence of thy lord. But Satan caused him to forget to mention it to his lord, so he (Joseph) stayed in prison for some years.

Joseph said to the wine-dreaming prisoner,

You will pour wine for your lord to drink.

To the other prisoner, he said,

You will be crucified and the birds will eat from your head.

43 And the king said: Lo! I saw in a dream seven fat kine which seven lean were eating, and seven green ears of corn and other (seven) dry. O notables! Expound for me my vision, if ye can interpret dreams.

44 They answered: Jumbled dreams! And we are not knowing in the interpretation of dreams.

45 And he of the two who was released, and (now) at length remembered, said: I am going to announce unto you the interpretation, therefore send me forth.

46 (And when he came to Joseph in the prison, he exclaimed): Joseph! O thou truthful one! Expound for us the seven fat kine which seven lean were eating and the seven green ears of corn and other (seven) dry, that I may return unto the people, so that they may know.

The king said to Joseph,

I saw in a dream seven lean cows eating seven fat cows.

And seven green ears and seven dry ears of corn.

OK you noatables, interpret my dreams.

They answered,

Those are some jumbled dreams!

One of the prisoners told Joseph the king's dream, and asked him to interpret it.

47 He said: Ye shall sow seven years as usual, but that which ye reap, leave it in the ear, all save a little which ye eat.

Joseph said,

There will be seven normal years,

48 Then after that will come seven hard years which will devour all that ye have prepared for them, save a little of that which ye have stored.

followed by seven hard years.

49 Then, after that, will come a year when the people will have plenteous crops and when they will press (wine and oil).

Then there will be a good year with wine and oil.

50 And the king said: Bring him unto me. And when the messenger came unto him, he (Joseph) said: Return unto thy lord and ask him what was the case of the women who cut their hands. Lo! my Lord knoweth their guile.

The king said to Joseph,

Why did the women cut their hands?

51 He (the king) (then sent for those women and) said: What happened when ye asked an evil act of Joseph? They answered: Allah Blameless! We know no evil of him. Said the wife of the ruler: Now the truth is out. I asked of him an evil act, and he is surely of the truthful.

52 (Then Joseph said: I asked for) this, that he (my lord) may know that I betrayed him not in secret, and that surely Allah guideth not the snare of the betrayers.

53 I do not exculpate myself. Lo! the (human) soul enjoineth unto evil, save that whereon my Lord hath mercy. Lo! my Lord is Forgiving, Merciful.

The women told the king,

He did nothing wrong.

And the ruler's wife said,

I asked him to do an evil act.

Joseph said,

I did nothing wrong.

54 And the king said: Bring him unto me that I may attach him to my person. And when he had talked with him he said: Lo! thou art to-day in our presence established and trusted.

The king said to Joseph,

I trust you.

55 He said: Set me over the storehouses of the land. Lo! I am a skilled custodian.

56 Thus gave We power to Joseph in the land. He was the owner of it where he pleased. We reach with Our mercy whom We will. We lose not the reward of the good.

57 And the reward of the Hereafter is better, for those who believe and ward off (evil).

Joseph said,

Entrust me with all the storehouses in the land..