1 Nephi

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22


Absurdities
Plagiarism
Injustice
Intolerance
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Science and History
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Dwindling in Unbelief
-Blogging the Book of Mormon
-1 Nephi

1830 Edition: 1 Nephi

BoM Seminary: 1 Nephi



Drunk With Blood:
God's killings in the Bible

by Steve Wells,
the creator of the SAB.

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1 Nephi: Intolerance

  1. "The Jews did mock him because ... he truly testified of their wickedness and their abominations ... they were angy with him ... as with the prophets of old, whom they had cast out and stoned."
    After Lehi saw the pillar of fire, God, Jesus, the apostles, and angels, and read from the book that God gave him, he went into town to tell the people about it. They all thought he was crazy, since they were a bunch of wicked, abominable Jews. 1:19-20

  2. "Laman and Lemuel ... were like unto the Jews."
    Nephi's older brothers, Laman and Lemuel, were so evil that they were "like unto the Jews." (Being like a Jew is about as bad as it gets in the Book of Mormon.) 2:11-13

  3. God goes on (and on) about what a great guy Nephi is and all the cool things he's going to do for him. But God hates Nephi's brothers, which he'll soon be cursing "even with a sore curse." 2:21-23

  4. Nephi saw an exceedingly white virgin. (Being white is exceedingly good in the Book of Mormon.) 11:13

  5. The Native Americans are the descendants of those "who dwindled in unbelief." As a punishment for their disbelief, their skin was darkened and they became "a filthy people, full of idleness and all manner of abominations." 12:22-23

  6. Nephi sees the "great and abominable church" and its founder, the devil. 13:6

  7. The wrath of God is on the Native Americans (Nephi's brethren). 13:11

  8. God's wrath is on the Native Americans who were slaughtered by the Europeans. 13:14

  9. God inspired the Europeans (who "were white, and exceedingly fair and beautiful" just like Nephi's descendants before the evil, dark-skinned Laminites killed them all ) to slaughter the Native Americans. 13:15

  10. "The Gentiles ... did humble themselves before the Lord; and the power of the Lord was with them." 13:16

  11. The angel tells Nephi that the "great and abominable church" (the Catholics) ruined the Bibe by deleting the "plan and most precious parts." 13:26-32

  12. Good news for "gentiles" in "the promised land." ("Gentiles" are non-Mormons and "the promised land" is the United States in Mormon-speak). All you have to do is become a Mormon and then you will be blessed by God (otherwise you're going to hell). 14:1-2

  13. The Catholic church was founded by the devil to lead souls to hell. 14:3

  14. f you're a gentile, you've only got two choices: become a Mormon or fall into the Catholic pit that leads to hell. 14:5-6

  15. The angel tells Nephi that the lamb of God (Jesus) says that the time will come (2423 years later) when a 17 year old treasure digger from New York (Joseph Smith) will find some golden plates and translate them by staring into his hat at some magic rocks and thereby produce the "great and marvelous work" that we now know as the Book of Mormon. This book is, according to the angel, the best and most important book by far that you, me, or anyone else will ever read. And we'll be tortured forever after we die unless we believe it. 14:7

  16. The "great and abominable church, ... the mother of abominations, whose founder is the devil." 14:9

  17. There are only two churches: the church of the Lamb of God, and the church of the devil.You either belong to the good chuch or the bad church (the mother of abominations, the whore of all the earth). 14:10

  18. "The whore of all the earth sat upon many waters." 14:11

  19. The angel showed Nephi the Mormon church (the church of the Lamb of God). There weren't many Mormons, though, because of that fucking whore that sat on many waters (the Catholic Church). 14:12

  20. The "great mother of abominations" recruits people from all over the earth to fight against the Lamb of God. 14:13

  21. God hated pretty much everyone on earth (they were all just a bunch of Catholics to him) until the Mormons showed up. 14:15-17

  22. The angel told Nephi to look over there. You see that guy in the white robe? That's the apostle John who will write the Book of Revelation about 700 years from now. (Which doesn't make a lot of sense since the apostle John didn't write Revelation, but oh well.) 14:18-22, 27

  23. There's an "awful gulf" that separates the wicked from the saints. 15:28

  24. There's an "awful hell" prepared for the wicked. 15:29

  25. There's an "awful hell" prepared by the devil. 15:35

  26. Among many other things, Nephi told his brothers that God straitens murmurers by sending fiery flying serpents to bite and kill them. (See Numbers 21:6) 17:41

  27. Then Zenos explains how all kinds of bad stuff would happen to the Jews because they "crucify the God of Israel." They'd be hated by all nations, wander in the flesh, etc. 19:13-14

  28. The members of "the great and abominable church" (the whore of all the earth) will kill each other and get drunk on their own blood. 22:13

  29. All those that fight again Zion (Mormonism), like "that great whore, that great and abominable church" will be destroyed. 22:14

  30. They who fight again Zion (Mormonism) will be cut off. 22:19

  31. You must do whatever the prophet (Jesus or Joseph Smith) says. Those who don't will be cut off. 22:20

  32. Soon all the churches of the devil (non-Mormon churches) will be destroyed. 22:23