So great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck. 17:2
Absurdity (213)
Injustice (39)
Intolerance (32)
Prophecy and Misquotes (19)
Cruelty & Violence (18)
Science (13)
Language (9)
Women (3)
Boring stuff (2)
Sex (2)
Contradictions (1)
Family Values (1)
The First Book of Nephi
1 And it came to pass exceedingly (1-20)
2 The incredible journey begins (1-24)
3 Oh my heck! We forgot the brass plates! (1-31)
4 Better for one man to die than a whole nation dwindle in unbelief (1-38)
5 After this manner of language did they speak (1-22)
6 It mattereth not to me that I am particular (1-6)
5 Oh Fetch! We forgot the fricken women! (1-22)
8 Lehi's magic happy-fruit tree (1-38)
9 Nephi names his plates (1-6)
11 The Spirit shows Nephi everything his father saw (1-36)
12 A dark, loathsome, filthy, idle, and abominable people (1-23)
13 The devil founds the Catholic church (1-9)
Columbus discovers America (10-12)
God helps the Gentiles slaughter the Native Americans (13-14)
The Gentiles were white, fair, and beautiful (just like the Nephites) (15-16)
God helps the Americans win the Revolutionary War (17-19)
The Catholic Church removed the plain and precious parts of the Bible (20-33)
The Book of Mormon restores the Bible (20-33)
14 There are only two churches - the church of God (the Mormons) and the church of the devil (everyone else) (1-30)
15 Nephi explains his dad's magic tree (again) (1-36)
A magic brass ball (9-17)
A broken steel bow (18-32)
Ishmael dies and his family revolts (33-39)
17 The Trip to Bountiful (1-6)
Nephi builds a ship (7-55)
18 Nephi discovers America (1-25)
19 The plates of ore (and the other plates) (1-7)
The prophecies of Zenock, Neum, and Zenos (8-23)
A reading from the book of the prophet Isaiah (824)
20 Sealing Isaiah: No peace for the wicked (1-22)
22 More Isaiah: Nursing fathers, drunk with blood (1-26)
22 Someday Catholics will get drunk on their own blood (1-31)
