Friend, how camest thou in hither not having a wedding garment? And he was speechless. Then said the king to the servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and cast him into outer darkness, there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. 22:12
Trivia: What did Jesus say about those who call other people fools?
The Bible in Fewer Words - Matthew (1)
Contradictions (145)
Absurdity (83)
Injustice (55)
Interpretation (38)
Science (33)
Cruelty & Violence (30)
Intolerance (26)
Prophecy and Misquotes (24)
Good Stuff (17)
Family Values (13)
Language (6)
Homosexuality (5)
Women (5)
Sex (4)
Boring stuff (3)
Politics (2)
EJAT (111)
The Gospel According to Matthew
1 The genealogy of Jesus (1-17)
The birth of Jesus (18-25)
The flight to Egypt (13-15)
Herod murders the infants in Bethlehem (16-18)
The return from Egypt (19-2)
Home in Nazareth of Galilee (16-18)
The baptism of Jesus (13-17)
4 Jesus is tempted by the devil (1-11)
Jesus calls his first disciples (12-22)
Jesus heals devil-possessed lunatics in Galilee (23-25)
Salt of the earth, light of the world (13-16)
Obey the law of Moses (every jot and tittle) (17-20)
Moses says this, but I say that (Name-callers go to hell) (21-24)
Some legal advice (25-26)
Lust = adultery (27-28)
Pluck out your eye, cut off your hand (29-30)
Divorce (31-32)
Don't swear (33-37)
Turn the other cheek (38-39)
Give to anyone who asks (40-42)
Love your enemies (43-47)
Be perfect (48)
6 Don't let others see your good works (1-4)
Don't pray in public (or use repetitions) (5-8)
The Our Father (or The Lord's prayer) (9-15)
Don't let others know that you're fasting (16-18)
Treasures in heaven (19-21)
The evil eye (22-23)
God and mammon (24)
Don't worry about food, clothes, or the future (25-34)
Pearls before swine (6)
Just ask God (and he'll give it to you) (7-11)
The golden rule (that's the whole law) (12)
Most people go to hell (13-14)
Watch out for false prophets (and bad trees) (15-20)
Didn't I cast out devils in your name, Jesus? (I never knew you) (21-23)
Obey Jesus (build your house on a rock) (24-29 Lk 6)
The centurion's servant (5-13)
Peter's mother-in-law (14-15)
Jesus casts out devils and heals the sick (16-17)
Let the dead bury the dead (18-22)
Jesus calms a storm (23-27)
Jesus casts out more devils (and drowns some pigs) (28-34)
The call of Matthew (9-13)
Why Jesus and his disciples didn't fast (14-17)
The ruler's daughter and a woman with an issue of blood (18-26)
Two blind men (27-31)
A dumb man possessed with a devil (32-34)
Jesus heals every sickness (35-38)
The mission of the apostles (5-10)
It'll be worse than Sodom and Gomorrah (11-15)
You'll be hated by everyone (16-25)
Whom you should fear (the one who can send you to hell) (26-31)
If you deny Jesus, he'll deny you (fair is fair) (32-33)
Don't love your family (more than Jesus) (34-39)
Be nice to Jesus's followers, and he'll be nice to you (40-42)
11 John the Baptist: Should we look for another? (1-6)
Jesus: John the Baptist is Elijah (7-19)
Jesus condemns certain cities (The ones that didn't like his preaching) (20-24)
Jesus: Thanks Father for hiding things from the wise (and revealing them to babies) (25-27)
Come to Jesus (28-30)
12 The disciples pluck grain on the sabbath (1-8)
A man with a withered hand (9-14)
God's chosen servant (15-21)
Jesus and Beelzebub (22-29)
The unforgivable sin (blasphemy against the Holy Ghost) (30-37)
An evil and adulterous generation (asks for a sign) (38-42)
The return of the unclean spirit (33-45)
Jesus: Who is my mother? (46-50)
13 The parable of the sower (1-9)
The purpose of the parables (to confuse people) (10-17)
Jesus explains the parable of the sower (18-23)
Weeds and wheat (24-30)
A mustard seed (31-32)
Heaven is like yeast (33)
The purpose of the parables (again) (34-35)
Jesus explains the parable of the weeds (36-43)
Three little parables (44-52)
Jesus is rejected in his hometown (53-58)
14 Herod: Jesus is the risen John the Baptist (1-5)
The imprisonment of John the Baptist (3-5)
The death of John the Baptist (6-12)
Jesus feeds five thousand men (13-21)
Jesus walks on water (22-33)
Jesus heals the sick in Gennesaret (34-36)
15 The Pharisees criticize Jesus's disciples (for not washing their hands before eating) (1-2)
Jesus criticizes the Pharisees (for not killing disobedient children) (3-9)
Things that defile a person (10-20)
Jesus removes a devil from a Canaanite woman's daughter (after calling her a dog) (21-28)
Jesus feeds four thousand men (29-39)
16 A wicked and adulterous generation (asks for a sign) (1-4)
The yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees (5-12)
Peter declares Jesus to be Christ (and becomes the first pope) (13-20)
Jesus foretells his death and resurrection (and calls Peter "Satan") (21-26)
Jesus will come again soon (within the lifetime of some of his listeners) (27-28)
Jesus: John the Baptist is Elijah (10-13)
Jesus heals a boy possessed by the devil (14-21)
Jesus foretells his death (again) (22-23)
Jesus pays his taxes (by taking a coin out of a fish's mouth) (24-27)
Cut off your hand and pluck out your eye (if they offend you) (7-9)
The lost sheep (10-14)
What to do with someone who trespasses against you (15-17 Lk 17)
Special powers given to believers (18-20)
How many times must we forgive? (490) (21-22)
The parable of the cruel master (23-35)
Eunuchs (12)
Little children (13-15)
The rich young man (16-26)
Abandon your family for Jesus (and you'll get 100x more and live forever) (27-30)
20 The parable of the unfair employer (1-16)
Jesus foretells his death (for the third time) (17-19)
The mother of James and John ask Jesus for a favor (Special seats in heaven) (20-28)
Two blind men (29-34)
21 Jesus rides into Jerusalem (on an ass and a colt) (1-11)
Jesus's temple tantrum (12-17)
Jesus kills a fig tree (by cursing it) (18-22)
Jesus stumps the chief priests and elders (23-27)
The parable of two sons (28-32)
A parable about a vineyard (33-46)
22 The parable of the wedding banquet (and the psycho king) (1-14 Lk 14)
Pay your taxes (15-22)
There is no marriage in heaven (23-33)
The greatest commandment (34-40)
24 Jesus is not the son of David (41-46)
23 Woe to scribes and Pharisees! (1-39)
24 The end of the world (1-51)
25 Heaven is like ten virgins (1-13)
The cruel and unjust master (14-30)
The sheep and the goats (31-46)
26 Jesus predicts his death (for the fourth time) (1-2)
The plot to kill Jesus (3-5)
Jesus gets his head anointed (the poor get nothing) (6-13)
Judas betrays Jesus (for thirty pieces of silver) (14-16)
The Last Supper (17-30)
Peter's promise (and Jesus's prediction) (31-35)
Jesus prays at Gethsemane (while the disciples sleep) (36-46)
Jesus is arrested (47-56)
Jesus is taken to Caiaphas (57-68)
Peter denies Jesus three times (before the cock crows once) (69-75)
27 Jesus is taken to Pontius Pilate (1-2)
Judas hangs himself (3-10)
Jesus is questioned by Pilate (11-14)
The people prefer Barabbas to Jesus (15-26)
The soldiers make fun of Jesus (27-30)
Jesus is crucified (31-44)
Jesus dies (45-56)
The burial of Jesus (57-66)
28 Jesus rises from the dead (1-10)
The priests bribe the guards (11-15)
Jesus appears to his disciples (but some doubted) (16-20)
