God gives Abraham and his descendants all of the land of Canaan "forever". This
promise is still used to justify the unending battles over the land in the
Middle East. 13:14-15, 17:8
An uncircumcised boy is to be abandoned by his parents and community.
17:14
God kills everyone (men, women, children, infants, newborns) in Sodom and Gomorrah
by raining "fire and brimstone from the Lord out of heaven." Well, almost everyone -- he
spares the "just and righteous" Lot and his family.19:24
Lot's nameless wife looks back, and God turns her into a pillar of salt.
19:26
Abraham makes his servant swear that he won't let Isaac marry
a Canaanite. 24:3
Jacob's sons can't stand the idea of their sister marrying someone who is uncircumcised. 34:14
"And Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord; and the Lord slew him."
What did Er do to elicit God's wrath? The Bible doesn't say. Maybe he picked up some sticks
on Saturday. 38:7
After God killed Er, Judah tells Onan to "go in unto they brother's wife." But "Onan
knew that the seed should not be his; and ... when he went in unto his brother's wife ... he
spilled it on the ground.... And the thing which he did displeased the Lord; wherefore he slew
him also." This lovely Bible story is seldom read in Sunday School, but it is the basis of many
Christian doctrines, including the condemnation of both masturbation and birth control.
38:8-10
After Judah pays Tamar for her services, he is told that she "played the harlot" and "is
with child by whoredom." When Judah hears this, he says, "Bring her forth, and let her be
burnt." 38:24
God decides to kill Moses because his son had not yet been circumcised. 4:24-26
God will kill the Egyptian children to show that he puts "a difference between the Egyptians and Israel."
11:7
After God has sufficiently hardened the Pharaoh's heart, he kills all the firstborn Egyptian children. When he was finished
"there was not a house where there was not one dead." 12:29
No stranger, foreigner, or uncircumcised person can eat the Passover.
12:43, 45, 48
If you do what God says, he won't send his diseases on you (like he did to the Egyptians).
But otherwise.... 15:26
When the people complain to Moses, he tells them they aren't complaining about him, but about God, making
them apostates and heretics, and therefore deserve severe punishment. Religious leaders have
used this tactic ever since. 16:8
Joshua, with God's approval, kills the Amalekites "with the edge of the sword."
17:13
The Lord will have war with Amalek from
generation to generation." 17:14
"The Lord has sworn [God swears!] that the Lord will have war with Amalek from generation to generation."
17:16
The first commandment ("Thou shalt have no other gods before me.") condemns those who worship any other than the
biblical god. 20:3
"Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." Thousands of innocent women have suffered excruciating deaths because of this
verse. 22:18
"He who sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the Lord only, he shall be utterly destroyed." If this commandment is obeyed,
then the four billion people who do not believe in the biblical god must be killed. 22:20
Don't even mention the names of the other gods. 23:13
Do not allow others to worship a different god. Conquer them
and destroy their religious property. 23:24
God promises to "send his fear before the Israelites" and
to kill everyone that they encounter when they enter the promised land.
23:27
Stay away from those who worship a different god. 23:32
Don't let any strangers attend your animal sacrifices. 29:33
Whoever puts holy oil on a stranger shall be "cut off from his people."
30:33
Those who break the Sabbath are to be executed. 31:14
Moses burned the golden calf, ground it into powder, and then forced it down the throats
of all the people. 32:20
God orders the sons of Levi (Moses, Aaron, and the other members of their tribe that were "on the Lord's side") to kill
"every man his neighbor.... And there fell of the people that day about 3000 men." 32:27-28
"Whosoever hath sinned against me, him will I
blot out of my book." 32:33
God drives out the pagan tribes and commands the Israelites to destroy their altars and places of worship.
34:11-14
God, "whose name is Jealous", will not tolerate the worship of any other god. 34:14
Whoever works, or even kindles a fire, on the Sabbath "shall be put to death." 35:2-3
Two of the sons of Aaron "offered strange fire before the Lord" and "there went out fire
from the Lord, and devoured them, and they died before the Lord." 10:1-2
Moses tells Aaron that his sons were burned to death to sanctfy and glorify God. 10:3
Moses tells Aaron's cousins to drag the burned bodies out of the camp, and he warns Aaron not to mourn the death of his sons or God will
kill him too, along with everyone else. 10:4-6
"When ye be come into the land of Canaan ... I put the plague of leprosy in ... the land of your possession."
God "put the plague of leprosy" on the Canaanites. 14:34
"Whosoever shall commit any of these abominations ... shall be cut off from among their people." 18:29
"Ye shall not eat any thing with the blood: neither shall ye use enchantment, nor observe times."
Don't eat anything with blood, or use magic or astrology. 19:26
"Ye shall not round the corners of your heads, neither shalt thou mar the corners of thy beard."
Don't round the corners of your head or beard. 19:27
"Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you."
Don't get an tatoos. 19:28
Stay away from wizards and people with familiar spirits. 19:31
Stay away from people with familiar spirits and don't "go a whoring" after them either.
20:6
If a man has sex with another man, kill them both. 20:13
People with "familiar spirits" (witches, fortune tellers, etc.) are to be
stoned to death. 20:27
Handicapped people cannot approach the altar of God. They would "profane" it.
21:16-23
No stranger or slave can "eat of the holy thing." 22:10, 13
If a priest's daughter marries "a stranger" she can't eat any holy things. 22:12
God won't accept animal sacrifices from strangers, since strangers have blemishes and are corrupt. 22:25
Don't do any work on the day of atonement or God will destroy you.
23:29-30
A man curses and blasphemes while disputing with another man. Moses asks God what to
do about it. God says that the whole community must stone him to death. "And the children of Israel did as the Lord
and Moses commanded." 24:10-23
Anyone who blasphemes or curses shall be stoned to death by the entire community.
24:16
God tells the Israelites to make slaves out of their neighbors and their families. The "heathens" and
"strangers" are to be their possessions forever. 25:44-46
If you don't follow all of the laws in the Old Testament, God will shower you with all of the curses in the next 25 verses.
26:14-15
"I will even appoint over you terror, consumption, and the burning
ague, that shall consume the eyes, and cause sorrow of heart: and ye shall sow your seed
in vain, for your enemies shall eat it." 26:16
"I will set my face against you, and ye shall be slain before your enemies." 26:17
"And if ye will not yet for all this hearken unto me, then I will punish you seven times more for your sins."
26:18
"I will bring seven times more plagues upon you according to your sins." 26:21
"I will also send wild beasts among you, which shall rob you of your children, and destroy your cattle." 26:22
"I ... will punish you yet (another) seven times for your sins." 26:24
"I will bring a sword upon you ... I will send the pestilence among you; and ye shall be delivered into the hand of the enemy."
26:25
"And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me ... then ... I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins."
26:27-28
"And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat." 26:29
"I will ... cast your carcases upon the carcases of your idols, and my soul shall abhor you." 26:30
"And I will bring the land into desolation". 26:32
"And I will scatter you among the heathen, and will draw out a sword after you: and your land shall be desolate, and your cities waste."
26:33
"And upon them that are left alive of you I will send a faintness into their hearts in the lands of their enemies; and the sound of a
shaken leaf shall chase them; and they shall flee, as fleeing from a sword; and they shall fall when none pursueth."
26:36
"And they shall fall one upon another, as it were before a sword, when none pursueth: and ye shall have no power to stand before your
enemies." 26:37
"And ye shall perish among the heathen, and the land of your enemies shall eat you up." 26:38
"And they that are left of you shall pine away in their iniquity in your enemies' lands; and also in the iniquities of their
fathers shall they pine away with them." 26:39
God defines the value of human life in dollars and cents. Of course, to God, females
are worth considerably less than males (50 - 60%) -- but neither are worth much.
27:3-7
God shows his hospitality with the admonition: "The stranger that cometh nigh shall be put to death."
1:51, 3:10, 3:38
Two of Aaron's sons are killed by God for "offering strange fire before the Lord."
3:4
God tells the people to expel from camp "every leper, every one that hath an issue, and whoever is defiled by the dead."
So by God's instructions, the sick are abandoned and left to suffer and die alone.
5:1-4
"And when the people complained, it displeased the Lord: and the Lord heard it." (He had his hearing aid on.) He then
burned the complainers alive. That'll teach them.
11:1
"And while the flesh [of the quails] was yet between their teeth, ere it was chewed, the wrath of the Lord was kindled
against the people, and the Lord smote the people with a very great plague. "The Bible isn't too clear about what these poor
folks did to upset God so much; all it says is that they had "lusted." 11:33
Separate yourselves from among this congregation, that I may consume them in a moment."
God warns everyone to get away; he's going to kill some more people. 16:20-21
"Hereby ye shall know that the LORD hath sent me ... if the LORD make ... the earth open her mouth, and swallow them up, with all
that appertain unto them, and they go down quick into the pit..."
Moses tells the people that if the ground opens up and swallows the rebels and their families, then you'll know that God's on his side.
16:28-30
"The earth opened her mouth, and swallowed them up, and their houses, and all the men that appertained unto
Korah ... They ... went down alive into the pit, and the earth closed upon them." 16:31-33
"And there came out a fire from the LORD, and consumed the two hundred and fifty men that
offered incense." 16:35
After God killed Korah, his family, and 250 innocent bystanders, the people complained saying, "ye have killed the
people of the Lord." So God, who doesn't take kindly to criticism, sends a plague on the people. And "they that died in the
plague were 14,700." 16:41-50
"Get you up from among this congregation, that I may consume them as in a moment."
God threatens (again) to kill everyone (but his special friends, Moses and Aaron). 16:44-45
"For there is wrath gone out from the LORD; the plague is begun ... they that died
in the plague were fourteen thousand and seven hundred." 16:46-49
"And the Lord hearkened to the voice of Israel, and delivered up the Canaanites; and they utterly destroyed them and
their cities." This verse demonstrates the power of prayer: If you ask God, he will destroy entire cities for you.
21:3
God delivers the Amorites into Moses' hands. (You're in God hands with Moses.) So Moses does the
Christian thing,
killing everyone "until their was none left alive." 21:34-35
After the people "commit whoredom with the daughters of Moab," Moses has them all killed. Then God tells Moses to
hang their dead bodies up in front of him; God says that this will satisfy him. 25:1-5
When one of the Israelite men brings home a foreign woman, "Phinehas (Aaron's grandson) sees them and throws a spear "through the man .. and the woman through her belly."
This act pleases God so much that "the plague was stayed from the children of Israel." But not before
24,000 had died. 25:6-9
For impaling the interracial couple, God rewards Phinehas and his sons with the everlasting
priesthood. 25:10-13
God tells Moses how to care for his neighbors by saying: "Vex the Midianites, and smite them."
25:16-17
The ground swallow Korah and his companions and a fire consumes 250 men. 26:10
"And Nadab and Abihu died when they offered strange fire before the Lord." When you go camping avoid making any
unusual fires. 26:61
Under God's direction, Moses' army defeats the Midianites. They kill all the adult males, but take the women and
children captive. When Moses learns that they left some live, he angrily says: "Have you saved all the women alive? Kill
every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children,
that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves." So they went back and did as Moses (and
presumably God) instructed, killing everyone except for the virgins. In this way they got 32,000 virgins -- Wow!
(Even God gets some of the booty -- including the virgins.) 31:1-54
God tells Moses to exterminate the residents of Canaan and destroy all of their religious symbols and possessions.
33:50-52
But if the Israelites don't kill them all, then God will make them pricks in their eyes and
thorns in their sides. And he will do unto the Israelites as he planned to do to the inhabitants of
Canaan. 33:55-56
If someone makes an image of anything (like a bird or flower) then God will destroy the entire
nation. 4:25-26
God brought the Israelites out of Egypt "by war ... and by great terrors." 4:34
The first commandment ("Thou shalt have no other gods before me.") condemns those who worship any other than the
biblical god. 5:4
If you worship the wrong god, God will get jealous and kill you. 6:15
God instructs the Israelites to kill, without mercy, all the inhabitants (strangers) of the land that they
conquer. 7:2
God forbids marriages with those of other tribes. 7:3
If you do show any mercy to such strangers, "give your daughters to any of them, or "take" any of their daughters, then
you'll get God so angry that he'll "destroy thee suddenly." 7:4
Destroy the altars, images, and places of worship of those with different religions.
7:5
God prefers the Israelites to everyone else. It's not that he's prejudiced, he just like them better.
7:6
God's favorite people will never be infertile (neither will their cows!) and will never get sick. (God will
send infertility and diseases on the other guys.) 7:14-15
God commands his people to "consume all the people which the Lord thy God shall deliver thee; thine eye shall have
no pity on them." 7:16
God will send hornets to kill your enemies, "for the Lord thy God is among you,
a mighty God and terrible." 7:20-23
"The LORD thy God shall deliver them unto thee, and shall destroy them with a mighty destruction, until they be destroyed."
7:23
Burn and "utterly detest" the religious symbols of other faiths. They are an abomination to God. If you bring such an image
into your house you will become "a cursed thing like it." 7:25-26
"If thou do at all forget the LORD thy God, and walk after other gods ... ye shall surely perish."
8:19-20
God orders the destruction of all other places of worship. 12:2-3
After God kills those of other faiths, be sure to reject their beliefs and do not
learn about them. Otherwise God will have to kill you too. 12:30
Prophets and dreamers are to be executed if they say or dream the wrong things.
13:1-5
If your brother, son, daughter, wife, or friend tries to get you to worship another god, "thou shalt surely kill him,
thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death." 13:6-10
If you hear of a city where another god is worshiped, then destroy everyone in the city (even the cattle) and burn
it down. (Watch out Salt Lake!) 13:12-16
Kill everyone who has religious beliefs that are different from your own.
17:2-7
Anyone who will not listen to a priest or a judge must be executed.
17:12-13
Wizards, witches, astrologers, and new age folks are all "an abomination unto the Lord."
18:10-12
False prophets are to be (you guessed it) executed. How do you know who is a false prophet? By whether or not their
predictions come true. (Watch out Jehovah's Witnesses!) 18:20
Women cannot wear men's clothing and vice versa -- it's
an "abomination unto the Lord." 22:5
God won't let bastards attend church. Neither can the sons or daughters of bastards "even to the tenth generation."
So if you plan to attend church next Sunday be ready to prove that your genitals are intact and don't forget your birth
certificate and genealogical records for at least the last ten generations. Don't laugh. This stuff is important to God.
23:2
No Moabite will ever be allowed into the congregation of the Lord. 23:3, 6
God commands the Israelites to "blot out the rembrance of Amalek from under heaven." A few hundred years later
God orders Saul to kill of the Amalekites "both man and woman, infant and suckling."
(1 Sam.15:2-3) 25:19
If you don't obey all of the laws that are given in the Old Testament, God shower you with the curses that are given
in the next 52 verses. 28:16-68
"The LORD shall send upon thee cursing, vexation, and rebuke, in all that thou settest thine hand unto for to do,
until thou be destroyed, and until thou perish quickly." 28:20
"The LORD shall make
the pestilence cleave unto thee, until he have consumed thee." 28:21
"The LORD shall cause thee to be smitten before thine enemies." 28:25
"And thy carcass shall be meat to
all the fowls of the air, and no man shall fray them away." 28:26
"The Lord will smite thee with the botch of Egypt, and the emerods [hemorrhoids], and with the scab, and with the
itch, whereof thou canst be healed." 28:27
"The Lord will smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart." 28:28
"And thou shalt grope at noonday, as the blind gropeth in darkness, and thou shalt not prosper in thy ways:
and thou shalt be only oppressed and spoiled evermore, and no man shall save thee." 28:29
"Thine ox shall be slain before thine eyes ... thine ass shall be violently taken away." 28:31
Thy sons and thy daughters shall be given unto another people." 28:32
"The fruit of thy land, and all thy labours, shall a nation which thou knowest not eat up; and thou shalt be only oppressed and crushed."
28:33
You will be enslaved and driven mad in another country. 28:33-34
"The Lord will smite thee in the knees, and in the legs, with a sore botch that cannot be healed, from the sole of thy
foot unto the top of thy head." 28:35
You will be ruled by other nations, forced to serve other gods, become a laughingstock among your neighbors, have
your crops destroyed by locusts, your vines eaten by worms, and have fruitless olive trees.
28:36-40
"Thou shalt begat sons and daughters, but thou shall not enjoy them; for they shall go into
captivity." 28:41
"All these curses shall come upon thee ... and upon thy seed for ever."
28:48-49
God will enslave you and destroy you with hunger, thirst, hardship,
and all kinds of deprivation. 28:48-52
"And thou shalt eat the fruit of thine own body, the flesh of thy sons and of thy daughters."
28:53
"So that the man that is tender among you, and very delicate, his eye shall be evil toward his brother, and toward the wife of his
bosom, and toward the remnant of his children which he shall leave: So that he will not give to any of them of the flesh of his
children whom he shall eat." 28:54-55
"The tender and delicate woman" will be forced to eat her own children "that cometh out from between her
feet." 28:56-57
"If thou wilt not observe to do all the words of this law that are written in this book. Then the LORD will make thy plagues wonderful,
and the plagues of thy seed ...
Also every sickness, and every plague, which is not written in the book of this law, them will
the LORD bring upon thee, until thou be destroyed." 28:58-61
If the Jews don't follow God's laws he'll have most of them killed. 28:62
"The LORD will rejoice over you to destroy you, and to bring you to nought." 28:63
"And the LORD shall scatter thee among all people, from the one end of the earth even unto the other; and there thou shalt serve other gods."
28:64
"The LORD shall give thee there a trembling heart, and failing of
eyes, and sorrow of mind." 28:65
"And thy life shall hang in doubt before thee; and thou shalt fear day and night, and shalt have
none assurance of thy life." 28:66
"In the morning thou shalt say, Would God it were even! and at even thou shalt say, Would God it were morning!
for the fear of thine heart wherewith thou shalt fear, and for the sight of thine eyes which thou shalt see." 28:67
God will have you sold to your enemies -- but even they won't buy you.
28:68
If you serve the gods of other nations, "all the curses that are in
this book" will fall upon you. 29:18-20
When God gets mad -- watch out! He'll starve you to death, burn you with fire, and send vicious beasts to
devour you. He'll "destroy both the young man and the virgin, the suckling also with the man of gray hairs." Not even the
helpless and innocent are spared by this psychotic God. 32:21-26
"For a fire is kindled in mine anger, and shall burn unto the lowest hell, and shall
consume the earth with her increase, and set on fire the foundations of the
mountains." 32:22
"I will heap mischiefs upon them; I will spend mine arrows upon them." 32:23
"They shall be burnt
with hunger, and devoured with burning heat, and with bitter destruction: I
will also send the teeth of beasts upon them, with the poison of serpents of
the dust." 32:24
"The sword without, and terror within, shall destroy both the young man and the virgin, the suckling also with the man of gray hairs."
32:25
"I said, I would scatter them into corners, I would make the remembrance of them to cease from among men." 32:26
God "magnifies" Joshua and promises to "without fail" drive out all the inhabitants of the lands through which they passed. 3:7
"And the city shall be accursed ... and all that therein, to the Lord: only Rahab the harlot shall live." God explains that
Rahab is to be spared since she hid Joshua's spies and lied to those who were searching for them (2:4-5). But why was
everyone else killed? Some of them were probably liars too. 6:17
Keep yourselves from "the accursed thing". Whatever that is. But be sure to save all the silver and gold for God!
6:18-19
"And they utterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, young and old, and ox, and sheep, and ass,
with the edge of the sword." 6:21
After killing everyone, "they burnt the city with fire, and all that was therein." Only the valuables (silver, gold, brass,
and iron) did they keep to "put into the treasury of the house of the Lord."
6:24
Joshua says that those who try to rebuild Jericho will be accursed by God, and will have to
sacrifice both their oldest and their youngest sons in its construction. Well, Jericho still exists
today, and is often considered to be the world's oldest, continuously occupied city.
6:26
God tells Joshua to kill whoever tood "the accursed thing." 7:10-12
Joshua and all the elders tear their clothes, fall on their faces, and put dust on their heads.
They perform this tantrum because the Israelites lost a battle [God was punishing them because one man
(Achan) "took of the accursed thing"]. 7:1-13
If you happen to see "the accursed thing," don't touch it. If you do, you, your family, and all of your animals must
be burned. 7:15
"And Joshua ... took Achan ... and his sons, and his daughters, and his oxen, and his sheep... And all of Israel
stoned them with stones, and burned them with fire, after they had stoned them with stones." This is because Achan "took
of the accursed thing" -- whatever that means. But why would God require that Achan's sons and daughters (and even his
animals) be stoned to death along with him? The Bible doesn't say. But it does tell us that "the Lord turned from the
fierceness of his anger" when Achan, his children, and his animals were stoned to death and their
dead bodies burned. 7:24-26
"When ye have taken the city [Ai] ... ye shall set the city on fire: according to the commandment of the LORD.
8:8
"When Israel had made an end of slaying all the inhabitants of Ai in the field ... all the Israelites returned unto Ai,
and smote it with the edge of the sword." 8:24
"All that fell that day, both of men and women, were twelve thousand." 8:25
"And the LORD said unto Joshua, Fear them not: for I have delivered them into thine hand."
God delivers the Amorites into Joshua's hand (so he can kill them all). 10:8
"And the LORD discomfited them before Israel, and slew them with a great slaughter at Gibeon, and chased them along the way."
God slaughters the Amorites and even chases them along the way. 10:10
"The LORD cast down great stones from heaven upon them ... and they died."
As the Amorites try to escape, God sends down huge hailstones and kills even more of them. 10:11
God tells Joshua to "pursue after your enemies and smite the hindmost of them." (Kick their butts.) Don't let any of
them escape "for the Lord your God hath delivered them into your hand." 10:19
Joshua tells his captains to "put your feet upon the necks of these kings." He says, "thus shall the Lord do to all of
your enemies." Then Joshua kills the kings and hangs them on trees. 10:24-26
"Thus shall the LORD do to all your enemies." 10:25
Joshua, at God's command, kills everyone and everything that he can find (including babies and little children)--
or, as the Bible puts it, he "utterly destroyed all that breathed, as the Lord commanded." 10:28-32
"Joshua ... smote it with the edge of the sword ... and all the souls that were therein; he let none remain."
10:28
"Then Joshua ... fought against Libnah: And the LORD delivered
it also ... and he smote it with the edge of the sword, and all the souls that were therein; he let none
remain in it." 10:29-30
"The LORD delivered Lachish into the hand of Israel, which ... smote it with the edge of the sword,
and all the souls that were therein." 10:32
"Joshua passed unto Eglon ... and smote it with the edge of the sword, and all the souls that were therein he utterly destroyed."
10:34-35
"Joshua went ... unto Hebron ... and smote it with the edge of the sword ... and all the cities ... and all the souls that were therein;
he left none remaining." 10:36-37
"Joshua returned ... to Debir ... And he took it ... and all the cities ... and they smote them with the edge of the sword,
and utterly destroyed all the souls that were therein; he left none remaining."10:38-39
"So Joshua ... left none remaining, but utterly destroyed all that breathed, as the LORD God of Israel commanded."
10:40
"All these kings and their land did Joshua take at one time, because the LORD God of Israel fought for Israel."
10:42
God delivers the Hazorites into Joshua's hand, and he knows just what to do with them: he smites them all with
(you guessed it) the edge of the sword until "there was not any left to breathe." 11:6-17
"And the LORD delivered them into the hand of Israel, who smote them ... and they smote them, until they left them none remaining."
11:8
"Joshua ... smote the king thereof with the sword." 11:10
"And they smote all the souls that were therein with the edge of the sword, utterly destroying them: there was not any left to breathe."
11:11
"And all the cities of those kings, and all the kings of them, did Joshua take, and smote them with the edge of the sword, and he utterly destroyed them,
as Moses the servant of the LORD commanded." 11:12
"Every man they smote with the edge of the sword, until they had destroyed them, neither left they any to breathe."
11:14
"As the LORD commanded Moses his servant, so did Moses command Joshua, and so did Joshua; he left nothing undone of all
that the LORD commanded Moses." 11:15
"So Joshua took ... all their kings ... and smote them, and slew them." 11:16-17
"For it was of the Lord to harden their hearts, that they should come against Israel in battle, that he might destroy
them utterly." Notice that God hardens their hearts so that he can have an excuse to kill them. 11:20
"Joshua destroyed them utterly with their cities." 11:21
"Did not Achan son of Zerah commit a trespass in the accursed thing, and wrath fell on all the congregation of
Israel?" To find out see Joshua 7:1-26. 22:20
"They slew the Canaanites that inhabited Zephath, and utterly destroyed it ... And the Lord was with Judah."
(You can tell by the number of innocent people he killed.) 1:17, 19
The Israelite spies killed everyone in Bethel, except for the man (and his family) who
showed them how to enter the city. 1:25
An angel drops by to rebuke the Israelites for being too tolerant of the religious
beliefs of the people they have been massacring. He tells them that since they didn't complete their
job (of killing everyone), God will not completely drive them out (like he promised to do). Instead
he'll keep some of them around so that the Israelites will be ensnared by their false gods.
2:1-3
God gets angry when the Israelites reject him and decide to worship other Gods. 2:12
God "delivers" more folks into the hands of his chosen people. "And they slew of Moab ... about 10,000 men
... and their escaped not a man." 3:28-29
Shamgar kills 600 Philistines with an ox goad. Praise God. 3:31
"The Lord discomfited Sisera ... with the edge of the sword ... and there was not a man left."
4:15-16
"So let all thine enemies perish, O Lord." (Let them all have their temples pierced by blessed women.)
5:31
"The LORD said unto him, Surely I will be with thee, and thou shalt smite the Midianites as one man."
God promises to help Gideon kill all the Midianites. 6:16
"The LORD said unto him ... throw down the altar of Baal ... and cut down the grove."
God tells Gideon to vandalize his neighbors' places of worship. 6:25
"The altar of Baal was cast down, and the grove was cut down." 6:28
Two princes are killed and their heads are brought to Gideon. 7:25
For refusing to feed him and his army, Gideon swears that he'll tear the flesh off the elders of Succoth.
(And he carries out his threat in verse 16.) 8:7
"He took the elders of the city, and thorns of the wilderness and briers, and with them he taught the men of Succoth."
8:16
"He beat down the tower of Penuel, and slew the men of the city." 8:17
"As soon as Gideon was dead ... the children of Israel ... went a whoring after Baalim."
8:33
"God ... delivered Sihon and all his people into the hand of Israel, and they smote them: so Israel possessed all the land of the Amorites."
11:21
"Whomsoever the LORD our God shall drive out from before us, them will we [the Israelites]
possess." 11:24
"The LORD delivered them into his hands ... And he smote them ... even twenty cities ... with a very great slaughter."
11:32-33
The Israelites "did evil in the sight of the Lord," so he "delivered them into the hand of the Philistines forty years."
13:1
Samson, with God's help, kills himself and 3000 Philistine men and women by causing a roof to collapse,
setting an example for Bible-based terrorism. 16:27-30
"The adversaries of the Lord shall be broken to pieces; out of heaven shall he thunder upon them." If God doesn't
like you, he'll send a thunderstorm your way to break your body into little pieces. 2:10
If you piss him off, God will cut off your arm, consume your eyes, grieve your heart, and kill your sons and
grandfathers. 2:31-34
God kills 50,070 men for looking into the ark. "And the people lamented, because the Lord had smitten many of
the people with a great slaughter." 6:19
"Saul ... slew the Ammorites unto the heat of the day." Then he took a little break. After all, killing is
hard work. 11:11
God delivers the Philistines into Jonathan's hand. And his very "first slaughter ... was about twenty men."
Not bad for a first slaughter. 14:12
Under God's influence, the Philistines killed each other. 14:20
But later, Saul and his army kill all of those who had not already been killed. 14:36
God orders Saul to kill all of the Amalekites: men, women, infants, sucklings, ox, sheep, camels, and asses.
Why? Because God remembers what Amalek did hundreds of years ago. 15:2-3
Saul killed everyone but Agag (the king) and the best of the animals. But still God was furious with Saul for
not killing everything as he had been told to do. He said, "it repenteth me that I have set Saul up to be king."
15:7-26
Saul is rebuked by Samuel for "doing evil in the sight of the Lord" by failing to kill all of the
Amalekites. 15:18-19
Because Saul didn't kill everyone as God commanded, God changes his mind about him
being king. 15:23-26
To please God, Samuel hacks Agag in pieces "before the Lord" [I bet God enjoyed that!] -- after Agag
pleads with him saying, "surely the bitterness of death has past." 15:32-34
"David went out, and fought with the Philistines, and slew them with a great slaughter." 19:8
"David inquired of the Lord, saying, Shall I go and smite these Philistines? And the Lord said unto David, Go,
and smite the Philistines ... So David smote them with a great slaughter."
23:2-5
David vows to kill "any that pisseth against the wall." 25:22, 34
"And David smote the land and left neither man nor woman alive." (No wonder God liked David so much!)
27:8-11
David spends the day killing more of those pesky Amalekites. They are completely wiped out again. (See
1 Sam.15:7-8, 20 and 27:8-9 for the
last two times that they were exterminated.) 30:17
Note that Solomon is told to stay away from foreign women. Why? Because they have different
("strange") religious beliefs, and God disapproves of mixed-faith marriages. 11:2
Joab (David's captain) spent six months killing every male in Edom. 11:16
To punish Jeroboam for making gold calves, God killed his son. 14:8-17
God shows his homophobia by calling gay people "sodomites" and their sexual relations "abominations."
14:24
Asa "did that which was right in the eyes of the LORD" by expelling homosexuals (or "sodomites", as the
good book calls them). 15:12
Baasha kills "all of the house of Jeroboam" leaving none "to breath." This slaughter was done "according to the
word of the Lord." 15:29
The prophet tells king Ahab that he, and his people, shall be punished for releasing Ben-hadad: "Your life
shall go for his life, and your people for his people." 20:42
Naboth is stoned to death for blaspheming god and the king. 21:13
Jehoshaphat "did that which was right in the eyes of the Lord" and "took" the homosexuals (sodomites) "out
of the land," or as the RSV says, "he exterminated" them. 22:43, 46
Ahaziah was sick and sent messengers to Baalzebub to ask if he would recover. God was jealous of the
attention given to his competitor and tells Ahaziah that he will die for asking the wrong god.
1:4, 17
Elijah shows that he is "a man of God" by burning 102 men to death for worshipping the wrong
god. 1:9-12
God sends two bears to rip up 42 little children for making fun of Elisha's bald head.
2:23-24
All seventy of king Ahab's sons are killed, their heads put in baskets, and sent to Jezreel. He says, "Lay ye
them in two heaps ..." 10:7-8
Jehu kills all that remained of king Ahab's family. 10:11
Jehu shows off his zeal for the Lord by murdering "all that remained unto Ahab in Samaria, till he had
destroyed him according to the word of the Lord." 10:16-17
Jehu lied to the followers of Baal so that he could trap and kill them.
10:19
Jehu warns his guards saying, "If any of the men escape, he that letteth him go, his life shall be
for the life of him." 10:24
Jehu, when he finishes his animal sacrifices, orders his men to "Go in, and slay them, let none
come forth. And they smote them with the edge of the sword." 10:25
God is greatly pleased with all of Jehu's killings, saying "because thou hast done well in executing
that which is right in mine eyes, and hast done unto the house of Ahab according to all that was in mine
heart [Jehu murdered them all], thy children of the fourth generation shall sit on the throne of Israel."
10:30
The "Lord's people" destroyed the "house of Baal" and and killed "the priest of Baal
before the altars." 11:17-18
God strikes king Azariah with leprosy "unto the day of his death" for not removing the high places.
15:5
God sent lions to devour the foreigners in Samaria because "they feared not the Lord," and even worse
"they knew not the manner of the God of the land." Well that'll teach them about God's manners.
17:25-26
King Josiah (with God's approval) "put down" the priests and destroyed the sacred objects of all other religions.
Josiah, with God's approval, broke down the houses of the sodomites. 23:7
Josiah, apparently with God's approval, kills "all the priests of the high places" and sacrifices them to God on
their altars. Note that this is a guy who "did what was right in the eyes of the Lord"
(2 Kg.22:2). 23:20
The sons of Reuben made war with the Hagarites and "there fell down many slain, because the
war was from God." They did pretty well for themselves, too, in God's war, taking 250,000
sheep and 100,000 slaves. 5:18-22
But the Israelites "transgressed against the God of their fathers, and went a whoring
after the gods of the people of the land, whom God destroyed before them." So God inspired the
Assyrians to go to war with the Israelites. 5:25-26
Asa destroyed his mother's phallic imaage idol. 15:16
Hate the sinner -- or God will pour his wrath out on you. 19:2
Only Levites can enter "the house of the Lord". "Whosoever else cometh
into the house, he shall be put to death." 23:6-7
God told Jehu to kill everyone in the house of Ahab (and then later condemned him for
it (Hosea 1:4)). 22:7-9
The priest (Jehoiada) tells the people to kill Athaliah and her followers. So they find her and kill
her. "And all the people of the land rejoiced: and the city was quiet, after
that they had slain Athaliah with the sword." (Don't you just love happy endings?)
23:14-15, 21
"Then all the people went to the house of Baal" and broke its altar into pieces
and killed Mattan the priest of Baal. 23:17
Amaziah (who "did that which was right in the sight of the Lord") killed 10,000 people; another
10,000 he left alive to throw off a cliff "that they all were broken in pieces."
25:1-2, 11-12
God makes Uzziah a leper for burning incense without a license. 26:19-21
Pekah killed 120,000 people in one day and enslaves 200,000 women and children
"because they had forsaken the Lord God of their fathers." 28:6, 8
Josiah, with the Bible's approval, persecuted those with different religious beliefs.
34:1-5
The Ammonite and the Moabite should not come into the congregation of God for ever.
13:1
Nehemiah rebukes the men for marrying "strange wives." To punish them he "contended with them, and
cursed them, and smote certain of them, and plucked off their hair." 13:25-27
"I have given Esther the house of Haman, and him they have
hanged upon the gallows, because he laid his hand upon the Jews." 8:1, 7
At Esther's request, the king orders a preemptive strike on all 127 provinces from Egypt to Ethiopia. Everyone who planned
to kill Jews shall be killed by Jews, along with their wives and children. And all this killing is to take place on a single day.
(How are the Jews to figure out who planned to kill them and who didn't? Were they supposed to just kill them all and let God sort it out?
And why did they need to kill the women and children?) 8:9-11
"Many of the people of the land became Jews; for the fear of the Jews fell upon them."
God's favorite way of making converts: Convert or be killed! 8:17
"The Jews smote all their enemies with the stroke of the sword, and slaughter, and destruction,
and did what they would unto those that hated them." 9:5
"In Shushan the palace the Jews slew and destroyed five hundred men." 9:6
"The ten sons of Haman the son of Hammedatha, the enemy of the Jews, slew they." 9:10
Esther asks the king to kill all those who planned to kill the Jews and hang the already dead bodies of Haman's ten sons on trees.
9:12-14
"The Jews ... slew three hundred men at Shushan." 9:15
"The other Jews ... slew of their foes seventy and five thousand." 9:16
If you ask God, he'll force heathens to be your slaves and help you
"dash them in pieces." 2:8-9
Kiss the Son or God will get angry and might have to kill you. 2:12
God has smitten his "enemies upon the cheek bone" and has "broken the teeth of
the ungodly." 3:7
Christians often say that one should love the sinner but hate the sin. Perhaps, but God hates sinners
and plans to destroy them. 5:5-6
If you pray to God, he will kill your enemies for you. 9:3-6
God will rain fire and brimstone on "wicked" folks. 11:6
"The LORD shall cut off all flattering lips, and the tongue that speaketh
proud things." 12:3
Atheists are fools who never do anything good. 14:1, 53:1
The God of peace teaches us how to kill our neighbors in war. 18:34
If you make God angry, he'll burn you and your children to death. 21:9-10
God will shoot his adversaries in the back with his arrows. 21:12
The psalmist sets an example for Christians by hating people but loving God. 31:6
A sweet prayer for the destruction of one's enemies: Let their way be dark and slippery: and let the angel of the LORD persecute
them.... Let destruction come upon him at unawares." 35:6,8
The Psalmist praises God for driving out and afflicting "the heathen" with his own hand. 44:2
If you forget God, God will tear you into pieces. 50:22
If you don't trust in God, he'll kill you and while you're dying the "righteous" will laugh at you.
52:5-7
God will send evil on the enemies of his followers. 54:5
Referring to his enemies, the psalmist says: "Let death seize upon them, and let them go down
quick into hell." 55:15
The psalmist devoutly prays: "Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth ... let them be
cut in pieces." 58:6-7
"The righteous" will rejoice when he sees "the wicked" being dismembered by God.
He'll even get a chance to wash his feet in their blood. Now that's entertainment!
58:10
The Psalmist asks God to kill all "the heathen" and not show them any mercy. 59:5
God will laugh at the heathen as he kills them. 59:8
"The God of mercy" will let the psalmist see his enemies tormented. 59:10
"Consume them in thy wrath, consume them." -- more sweet prayers to a savage god. 59:13
God divides the world into those countries that he likes and those that he doesn't.
Those he doesn't like he calls names (like "washpot") and says that he will throw his sandal on them.
60:7-8
God will "wound the head of his enemies" so that the righteous can wash their feet "in the blood
of thine enemies, and the tongue of thy dogs in the same." 68:21, 23
The psalmist prays that his enemies be tormented and blinded by God. He asks God to "make their loins
continually to shake." 69:23-28
"They that are far from thee shall perish: thou hast destroyed all them that go a whoring from thee." 73:27
"The LORD heard this" (he had his hearing aid on) and became angry, and burned people
"because they believed not in God." 78:21-22
"The wrath of God came upon them" and God killed many of the Israelites for not believing in "his
wondrous works." 78:31-34
God "cast out the heathen" and gave their lands to the Israelites. 78:55
The psalmist asks God to pour out his wrath on somebody else for a change. Why not torment some
strangers "that have not known thee?" 79:5-6
The psalmist asks God to " do unto them as unto the Midianites ... which became as dung for the earth."
83:9-18
If you don't follow God's commandments, he will beat you with a rod. 89:31-32
"I will ... destroy all the wicked of the land." 101:8
The psalmist recounts God's treatment of the Egyptians: "He smote the firstborn in their land." See Ex.12:29-30 for the gory details.
105:29-36
God is praised for the creative ways that he kills people: drowning, earth-swallowing, burning,
etc. 106:11-19
God sent a plague on the Israelites for "committing whoredom with the daughters of Moab." But
"then stood up Phinehas, and executed judgment [by throwing a spear through a newly married couple]:
and so the plague was stayed." But not before 24,000 (1 Cor.10:8
says 23,000) had died. (See Num.25:6-9 for all the gory details.)
106:29-30
God is offended by those who make things with their hands or invent things with their minds.
106:39
The psalmist asks God to do all sorts of unpleasant things to his enemies. "Set thou a wicked man over
him; and let Satan stand at his right hand .... Let his prayer become sin." He asks God to take away his possessions,
kill him, and have his children suffer for the sins of their fathers. 109:6-14
God will "fill the places with dead bodies" of heathens. 110:6
God is praised for slaughtering kings, nations, and little babies. 135:8, 10
"To him that smote Egypt in their first born: for his mercy endures forever."
136:10
The psalmist excels at hating. He hates people with a "perfect hatred" and asks God to kill
them. 139:19-22
A prayer that God will burn people to death. 140:10
The God of Peace teaches us to kill each other in war. 144:1
The saints praise God while they kill and enslave "the heathen." 149:5-8
"They declare their sin as
Sodom, they hide it not. Woe unto their soul!" The biblical god just doesn't seem to care
much for homosexuals. And he gets especially upset when "they hide it not."
3:9
God will kill those who despise his word and fail to follow his laws. Their
carcasses will be "torn
in the midst of the streets." 5:24-25
If you associate or gird yourself, God will break you in pieces. 8:9
God will have no mercy on the widows and children of hypocrites. 9:17
God will slaughter children "for the iniquity of their fathers." 14:21
After God destroys Moab, the rivers will be red with blood. He will send lions to
eat any survivors. 15:9
The God of Peace will set brother against brother and kingdom against kingdom. Then he'll make the survivors seed the
counsel of "wizards," and subject them to a "cruel lord." 19:2-4
The Apocalypse of Isaiah: God will destroy the earth, burning everyone and every living thing
alive (except maybe a few men). 24:1-6
God will have no mercy on those who don't understand him. 27:11
"And the people shall ... be burned in the fire." 33:12
God is furious at everyone and is ready to kill them all. Or as Isaiah so delicately puts it: "Their stink shall come up
out of their carcasses, and the mountains shall be melted with their blood." 34:2-3
God makes Egypt, Ethiopia, and Seba pay for Israel's sins. He says that
he likes Israel better than any other country so he's willing to sacrifice other countries for the
Israel's sake. 43:3-4
No astrologer, stargazer, or prognosticator will be able to save those that God plans to burn to death.
47:13-14
God "will do his pleasure on Babylon." (He will mercilessly slaughter the Babylonians.)
48:14
"I will feed them that oppress thee with their own flesh; and they shall be drunken with
their own blood, as with sweet wine." 49:26
Nations that do not serve Israel will perish. 60:12
"God's servants" will have it good; everyone else will suffer big time. 63:13-16
"I will ... trample them in my fury; and their blood ... will stain all my raiment." (God's clothes
will get stained with the blood of humans.) 63:2-6
Don't eat "swine flesh" (like ham or bacon) or other "abominable things"
or God will have to kill you. 65:4, 66:17
"God's servants" will eat, drink, and be merry; everyone else will be hungry, thirsty,
and ashamed -- until God kills them, that is. 65:13-16
God will "plead with all flesh" with fire and sword, "and the slain of the Lord shall be many."
66:16
The carcasses of those killed by God will be piled high. They will rot and burn forever. And although their stench will
be revolting to humans, it will be a sweet savour unto the Lord. 66:24
Jeremiah prays for the destruction of people and families that don't call on God's name.
10:25
Those who don't follow the Old Testament laws are cursed by God. 11:3
Jeremiah prays for vengeance upon his enemies. 11:20
Jeremiah asks God to drag away his enemies like "sheep for the slaughter."
12:3
If any nation does not listen to God, he "will utterly pluck up and destroy that
nation." 12:17
Worshipping other gods "is good for nothing." 13:10
God plans to make everyone in the kingdom drunk and then "dash the fathers and the sons
together." The merciful God of Peace vows to "not pity, nor spare, nor have mercy, but destroy
them." 13:13-14
God tells Jeremiah not to pray for the people. God has decided to kill them all and he doesn't want to
be talked out of it. 14:11
God will destroy by famine and sword those who are misled by the prophets, as well as the prophets
themselves. 14:15-16
God plans to do four things to his people: 1) kill them with swords, 2) tear their flesh with dogs, 3) have the birds, and 4) the beasts eat their bodies. Why will he do these terrible things? Because of
something some former king did. 15:2-4
God will kill children if their parents worship other gods. 16:10-11
God will enslave the people of Judah because they worshipped the wrong gods. 17:4
Jeremiah asks God to bring evil upon his enemies and to "destroy them with double destruction."
17:18
If you don't honor the Sabbath, God will burn you to death unquenchable fire.
17:27
For worshipping "other gods, whom neither they nor their fathers have known," God will make
parents eat their own children, and friends each other. Then he'll feed whoever's left to the birds.
19:4, 7-9
God will break those who worship other gods as though they were made of clay, killing
so many that there will not be enough room to bury them all. 19:11-13
Don't make God angry by going after other gods. If you do, he'll just have to hurt you. 25:6
God kills Hananiah for prophesying falsely. 28:15-17
God will kill those who refuse listen to his prophets. 29:19
God will punish the children of Shemaiah for their father's false prophecy. 29:32
God threatens again to send his people the sword, pestilence, and
famine, saying he'll feed their dead bodies to the fowls and beasts of the earth.
34:17-20
God is angry at the Israelites for making things with their hands and burning
incense to other gods. 44:8
God is going to do some really bad things to the people because the women burned incense to the "Queen of
Heaven" (Mary?). 44:15-23
"I will punish the multitude of No, and Pharaoh, and Egypt, with their gods, and their kings; even Pharaoh, and all them that trust in him."
46:25
God will destroy everyone in Moab. Fire will burn their heads,
and their sons and daughters will be taken captive. 48:42-47
God will cause the daughters of the Ammonites to be burned with fire. 49:2
God will send such marvelous plagues on Edom that everyone will hiss in astonishment. 49:17
God plans to "bring evil upon" the people of Elam. He says he'll kill them all with a sword.
49:37
If a good person does something wrong after God "lays a stumbling block before
him," then God will kill him. "He shall die in his sin" and whatever good he
has done will be forgotten. 3:20
God will decorate the land with the bones and dead bodies of those who worship a different god.
6:4-5
God shows Ezekiel a group of women weeping for Tammuz. Tammuz was the Sumero-Accadian god of plant life.
Each year after the summer solstice there was a period of ritual mourning for the loss of sunlight and
the decline of vegetation. God calls it an abomination. 8:14-15
God again vows to destroy those that dare worship something or someone other than him.
14:6-8
God planned to "pour out [his] fury" on the Hebrews in
Egypt for worshipping idols. But then he changed his mind, thank God. 20:7-8
"I will do these things unto thee, because thou hast gone a whoring after the heathen ... Thou shalt be laughed to scorn and had in
derision ... thou shalt be filled with drunkenness and sorrow." 23:30-33
God will kill everyone that claps his hands or stamps his feet "against the land of Israel."
When he's done with the killing everyone will know that he is the Lord. 25:6-17
God says he will destroy Tyrus. He plans to kill everyone, but he is especially looking
forward to killing all of the women. "And her daughters which are in the field shall be slain by the sword; and
they shall know that I am the LORD." 26:1-21
God says that Zidon will know that he is the Lord when he sends "pestilence and blood
into her streets." 28:22-23
God tells Ezekiel to prophesy against the pharaoh and against all Egypt. God says he will
feed the Egyptians to the birds and beasts. 29:2-5
"The day ... of the LORD is near, a cloudy day; it shall be the time of
the heathen." God plans to wipe out the heathen. When? Soon. Really soon.
30:3
God will punish Egypt and her allies by sending Nebuchadrezzar to "fill the land with
the slain." Then he will make "the rivers dry," sell the land to "the
wicked," make "the land waste," light fires, and kill all their young men with
the sword. 30:4-26
"And they shall know that I am the LORD, when I have set a fire in Egypt." (The Divine Pyromaniac)
30:8, 30:14, 30:16
God will treat Pharaoh like a whale fished out of the sea. Every bird and beast in the world
will feed upon him. 32:3-6
Pharaoh and all his multitude, along with the uncircumcised, will be killed with the sword.
32:20-32
Worshipping idols and other gods is "detestable." 37:23
God "will send a fire on Magog ... and the heathen shall know that I am
the Lord." 39:6-7
No stranger or uncircumcised person may enter the sanctuary. 44:9
Priests who sacrifice to idols will have God's hand against them and "shall bear their iniquity."
44:10-12
Nebuchadnezzar, after first trying to burn to death the three Hebrews,
now decrees that everyone who says anything against the Hebrew god "shall be cut
in pieces, and their houses shall be made a dunghill." 3:29
King Darius makes a decree, "that in every dominion of my kingdom men tremble and fear before the God of Daniel."
6:26
"Neither shall he regard the God of his fathers, nor the desire of women".
The antichrist is gay
and Jewish! 11:37
It's not clear in the KJV, but "people" and "strangers" are translated as "aliens" and
"foreigners" in other versions. This would mean part of the reason for Ephraim's bloody fate is
association with other races. 7:8-9
"Woe unto them! for they have fled from me: destruction unto them!" 7:13
For ignoring God "their princes shall fall by the sword." 7:16
Because the Samaritans chose to worship another deity, God will dash their infants to pieces and
their "women with child shall be ripped up." 13:16
The divine pyromaniac threatens to "send fire unto" Hazael, Gaza, Tyrus, Teman,
Rabbah, Moab, and Judah. 1:4, 7, 10,
12, 14; 2:2,
5
God says there are three or four reasons for him to punish Moab. But he only
mentions one: "because he burned the bones of the king of Edom." So God burned Moab because
they burned some bones. 2:1
God will "cut off" all those who "have not sought the Lord" or who worship another god. 1:4-6
God "will punish the princes, and the king's children, and all such as are clothed with strange
apparel" or "leap on the threshold." 1:8-9
God doesn't have night-vision, so he needs candles when he comes to
punish the people that say, "The LORD will not do good, neither will he do evil."
1:12
God will "bring distress upon men" so that they "walk like blind men."
He will pour out their blood like dust and "their flesh as dung." 1:17
God will kill all the inhabitants of the sea coast. 2:5
God will destroy Moab and Ammon just like he did to Sodom and Gomorrah. 2:9
"And men shall worship him, every one from his place, even all the isles of
the heathen." 2:11
God will kill the Ethiopians with his own sword. 2:12
Old Testament: Intolerance
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