Hosea
Introduction

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14


Injustice
Cruelty and Violence
Women
Family Values
Contradictions
Language
Absurdities
Sex
Intolerance
Prophecy
Interpretation
Good Stuff


Hosea: Absurdity

  1. God tells Hosea to commit adultery, saying "take ... a wife of whoredoms and children of whoredoms" because the land has "committed great whoredom." So Hosea did as God commanded and "took" a wife named Gomer. 1:2-3

  2. "I will destroy ... her fig trees." (God hates figs.) 2:12

  3. "She decked herself with her earrings and her jewels, and she went after her lovers, and forgat me, saith the LORD." 2:13

  4. "Thou shalt call me Ishi."
    God wants people to call him "Ishi" (which means "husband"). 2:16

  5. In that day will I make a covenant for them with the beasts of the field and with the fowls of heaven, and with the creeping things of the ground."
    Someday God will make a covenant with the beasts, fowls, and creeping things. 2:18

  6. WooHoo! God's getting married. He's even going to get to know his wife. 2:18-19

  7. On his wedding day, God (Ishi) will hear the heavens and the heavens will hear the earth. And the earth will hear the corn, and the wine, and the oil. And Ishi will sow his wife on the earth. (Or something like that.)2:21-23

  8. "Fear the Lord and his goodness in the latter days."
    Why would anyone fear goodness? 3:5

  9. Because of the Israelites' disobedience, the land mourns, and all the animals are dying. 4:3

  10. "They have made princes, and I knew it not." 8:4

  11. "The prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad." 9:7

  12. "The LORD ... shall roar like a lion: when he shall roar, then the children shall tremble from the west". 11:10

  13. God will rip humans apart and then eat them like a lion. 13:7-8


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