Apocrypha / Deuterocanonical Books

Judith (Douay-Reims Bible)
Introduction

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16


Absurdities
Injustice
Cruelty and Violence
Women
Intolerance
Sex
Contradictions

Dwindling in Unbelief
-Apocrypha

Judith: Absurdity

  1. King Arphaxad made the walls of Ecbatana 32 meters wide and 14 meters tall. 1:2

  2. Holofernes had an infinite supply of camels and sheep. 2:8

  3. The army ... covered the face of the earth, like locusts." 2:11

  4. "Nabuchodonosor the king had commanded him to destroy all the gods of the earth, that he only might be called God." 3:13

  5. "The priests put on haircloths, and they caused the little children to lie prostrate before the temple of the Lord, and the altar of the Lord they covered with haircloth." 4:8

  6. "All the people fell upon their faces." 6:14

  7. Judith wore haircloth on her loins. (She was an especially virtuous woman.) 8:6

  8. God, the great beautician, made Judith more beautiful. Then she and her slave took a bottle of wine and left to visit Holofernes. On the way she passed by the Hebrew old men, who "admired her beauty exceedingly." 10:4-7

  9. Holofernes gets drunk and falls in lust with Judith. 12:17-20

  10. Judith shows off the head of Holofernes, assuring everyone that no sex was involved in the performance of the murderous deed. 13:17-20

  11. For cutting off the head of a drunken man as he slept, Judith is blessed by God "above all woman." (Even more blessed than Jael and Mary?) 13:23-25

  12. Judith tells the Israelite army that the Assyrian captains will freak out when the see the headless Holofernes wallowing about in his own blood. That's when, she says, the Israelites should attack, knowing that God will kill the Assyrians for them. 14:4-5

  13. When Achior (the leader of the Ammonites) saw what God had done (helped Judith cut off a drunken man's head) he immediately converted to Judaism and cut off his own foreskin. 14:6

  14. The Israelites hang Holfernes head on the wall, gathered their weapons, and set out "with a great noise and shouting." 14:7

  15. When the Assyrian army sees the headless body of Hofernes "sweltering in his blood," they all screamed and "rent their garments." 14:13-18

  16. The Assyrian army ran away after hearing about the headless Holfernes, and the Israelites (with God's help) slaughtered them as they ran, taking all their stuff and giving it to Judith -- the forever blessed, glory of Jerusalem and joy of Israel. (God gave Judith the strength to behead a sleeping man to reward her for not having sex after her husband died.) 15:1-15

  17. Judith sings a song of praise to herself for cutting off a sleeping man's head. 16:1-28